'F9' (2021) Movie Review

F9, yes, the ninth installment of everyone’s favorite family-centric saga of street-racers-turned-international-agents-of-espionage, is somehow both exactly as ridiculous as expected and even sillier than anticipated. This makes the movie simultaneously ludicrous over-the-top escapism and tediously overwrought nonsense drama. It’s a strange duality. We’ve come so far from the days of hijacking shipments of DVD players.

'F9' Trailer: Beefy Dudes, Magnet Cars, Family, And A Flying Pontiac Fiero

A magnet car, a jet being taken out by a truck, beefy dudes brawling, talk of family, a long-dead character brought back to life, a flying Pontiac Fiero? All of this taken together can only mean one thing: there’s a new F9 trailer and it’s even more bonkers than you thought.

'Hobbs & Shaw' Trailer: Dwayne Johnson And Jason Statham Fight Idris Elba With An Axe And A Chainsaw

At this point, I don’t need a trailer to know I want to see Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw. But that doesn’t mean this latest, and “final,” trailer doesn’t make me smile like a drooling idiot. Because it does. This is ridiculous, and I mean that as the highest praise. I didn’t stop grinning the whole time. Check it out below.

The Latest 'The Fate Of The Furious' Trailer Is More Absurd Than You Ever Dreamed Possible

As long as they keep cranking out Fast & Furious movies, and as long as they continue to spiral into insanity, I’ll keep watching. And if you thought Furious 7, with it’s CGI Paul Walker and cars jumping from building to building and parachuting out of cargo planes was bonkers, well, you need to watch the new Fate of the Furious trailer. I don’t even know what they’re doing anymore, but hot damn do I love it. Seriously, there’s a submarine in a car chase, what more can a growing boy ask for?

'The Fate Of The Furious' Trailer: Say It Ain't So, Vin Diesel

Between Vin Diesel’s Dominic Toretto turning his back on his makeshift family, Charlize Theron’s terrible, terrible pseudo-dreadlocks (is she going to a rave?), and a goddamn submarine bursting through the icepack and getting into a high-speed chase with a Lamborghini and a tank, I have no clue what’s going on in the first trailer for The Fate of the Furious, the latest in the Fast and Furious franchise. But holy hell, whatever it is, I love the shit out of it.

'Red 2' Movie Review

 

As you most likely guessed from the title, “RED 2” is the sequel to a movie called “RED,” which, in reality, has little to nothing to do with the color. Instead we’re talking about an acronym that, in this instance, stands for “Retired Extremely Dangerous.” This is a designation the CIA, at least in the world of Warren Ellis’ comic that serves as the source material, gives to former agents that could still prove to be a threat down the road. They may not be in the field anymore, but they’re still good at killing. Who knows if this is a real thing or not? Never having worked for the CIA, or any intelligence gathering agency for that matter, I can offer no insight on the matter. I have, however, seen “RED,” so I feel qualified to chime in on that side of the conversation.

'The Debt' Movie Review

“The Debt” had me for two-thirds of the movie—maybe it was even three-quarters, I wasn’t wearing a watch. John Madden’s (director of “Shakespeare In Love” John Madden, not the senile, football-spouting loudmouth with the same name) crafts a tense thriller about Israeli Nazi hunters that grips you and has you on the edge of your seat and all of that other stuff that a thriller is supposed to do. Even in moments of down time you’re still engrossed, leaning slightly forward, hanging on every frame. The film is expertly paced, flawlessly acted, and has a unique, intricate structure that is executed with pinpoint accuracy.