'The Burning Sea' (2021) Movie Review

With 2015’s The Wave and it’s 2018 sequel The Quake, Norway turned in two of the best disaster movies of the last decade, if not longer. It’s a feat made even more impressive that they both cost around $6 million and pulled off spectacle on a scale Hollywood hasn’t achieved recently with exponentially more money. Much of the creative team, including Quake director John Andreas Anderson, and writer Harald Rosenlow-Eeg, who penned the previous two films, are back with a new cinematic catastrophe, The Burning Sea.

'Greenland' Trailer: Gerard Butler Fights A Planet-Killing Comet

Oh my, this is just the kind of pick me up I needed today. Given the chaotic, unstable state of the world—what with entitled assholes refusing to stay home or wear masks to prevent a global pandemic and Black people begging the police not to murder them—many may not want to watch an apocalyptic, end-of-the-world movie. I, however, say bring that shit on. Especially when it stars Gerard Butler. And in that spirit, here is the first trailer for the Gerard-Butler-fights-a-planet-killing-comet movie, Greenland. Yeah, that’s the good stuff.

'The Quake' (2018) Movie Review

Simply put, 2015 Norwegian import The Wave is the best disaster movie in recent years. Not only does it deliver on the spectacle such movies require, it’s also full of strong characters, legitimate emotional stakes, and deep investment. It also landed director Roar Uthaug the gig helming the latest Tomb Raider iteration. And all of this for a roughly $6 million price tag.

'Skyscraper' (2018) Movie Review

Why not? I’ll watch a one-legged Dwayne Johnson dangle off of a burning building with Neve Campbell for 102 minutes. Sure, there’s more to Skyscraper than that, but not much. And that’s all that matters in what’s a serviceable, at times goofily over-the-top entertaining, at times dreadful and dreary Die-Hard-meets-Towering-Inferno riff. And I’m fairly certain the entire film was bankrolled by the Chinese duct tape industry. Seriously, the silver-backed tape has a much more significant presence than it has any right to.

'Deepwater Horizon' (2016) Movie Review

As a filmmaker, Peter Berg is in love with the process of things. He fills his films, even Battleship, with meticulous, methodical sequences, like a helicopter refueling early on in his latest tale of real-life disaster and heroism, Deepwater Horizon. An affection and even tenderness washes over what amounts to little more than a mechanical interaction between man and machine.

'Independence Day: Resurgence' (2016) Movie Review

Independence Day: Resurgence, the long-awaited (at least in years, I’m not sure if anyone has actually been waiting 20 years for this) sequel to Roland Emmerich’s 1996 alien invasion disaster flick, is nonsensical shit garbage. But it’s nonsensical shit garbage that I thoroughly enjoyed.

'San Andreas' Movie Review: As Fun As It Is Ridiculous

If you saw the trailers and TV spots of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson racing a boat up the face of a tsunami and weaving a helicopter in and out of collapsing skyscrapers, and thought to yourself, “This San Andreas movie looks pretty awesome,” then you are going to be really happy. If you had the opposite reaction, or are looking for nuanced characters, a unique and interesting plot, or any form of subtlety, you will not be. San Andreas is, however, exactly the movie that’s been advertised. This is Dwayne Johnson fighting a fucking earthquake, and as ridiculous as it is, it’s also a gleeful epic blast.

Dwayne Johnson Will Save You In This 'San Andreas' Trailer

You know who I will follow blindly in the event of any major disaster? That’s right, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. And that includes in the aftermath of a massive earthquake, just like in the first trailer for his upcoming San Andreas. This looks so, so dumb, but also super awesome.

Blu-Ray/DVD Review: 'Aftershock'

 

To lay this out right off the bat, I’ve never been a big fan of anything Eli Roth has ever done. There are two exceptions, he’s great in “Inglorious Basterds,” and that fake trailer he made for “Grindhouse” is pretty fantastic. Aside from that, the “Hostel” films don’t do anything for me, and I even found “Cabin Fever” underwhelming. I want to like his movies—sometimes I feel like it makes me a bad horror fan that I don’t—and I appreciate how excited and enthusiastic he always comes across about the genre, but it simply hasn’t clicked. I keep trying, but failing to make that connection.

'Contagion' Movie Review

If you’re not already freaked the hell out by the idea of a global pandemic—some heretofore unknown and untreatable disease sweeping across the face of the Earth, leaving a trail of devastation and death—Steven Soderbergh’s (“Traffic”) latest movie, “Contagion”, might just do the trick. The film is a cold, almost clinical presentation of a virus that quickly mushrooms out of control, to the point that when you hear someone cough three rows behind you, you’ll want to bolt from the theater, douse yourself in hand sanitizer, and make a beeline for the hills.

'Final Destination 5' Movie Review

There were a lot of things I didn’t expect from “Final Destination 5”. First off, I didn’t really expect it to happen, but it did, so right out of the gate it defied my expectations. Was there really such a big audience just clamoring for a fifth chapter that they had to make this film? The second thing I didn’t expect was that I would enjoy “Final Destination 5”, but I sure as hell did. I guess that’s what I get for making assumptions—I made an ass out of u, me, and umption. “Final Destination 5” is not a good movie by any means, in fact in many ways it is barely competent, but goddamn it is a lot of fun.

'The Hangover 2' Movie Review

You may or may not know this—depending on how much of the advertising blitz for “The Hangover Part 2” you’ve absorbed in recent days—but it seems that the Wolfpack is in fact back. The most common cry across the landscape of the internet has been that the sequel looks exactly like the first film. On a recent episode of “Ellen”—yes, I watch “Ellen” from time to time—Bradley Cooper confirmed as much, and he is entirely correct. Director Todd Phillips and company employ the same “lost night” story-telling technique that worked so well in the original, and “The Hangover 2” is a really little more rehash of “The Hangover”. Which means that it is still pretty damn funny.

DVD/Blu-ray Review: 'Blue Valentine'

“Blue Valentine” garnered a great deal of buzz in December 2010 when it was slapped with an NC-17 rating. Eventually the Weinstein Company managed to release is with an R rating without having to make any cuts to the film. I honestly don’t see what the big deal was about, the sex scenes that were cited in the original ruling are way less graphic, and way more tame than what you get in a lot of standard R movies. The discussion about the arbitrary nature of the ratings system is a topic for another time, but “Blue Valentine” is now out on DVD and Blu-ray, so if you, like me, missed out on the theatrical release, you can check it out and judge for yourself.

'The Walking Dead Season One' DVD Review

The Show:

Robert Kirkman's “The Walking Dead” is one of the best monthly comics in recent memory. Though it may be about zombies on the surface, like the best of the genre, the heart of the story is the human element. Kirkman uses the plague of the undead to heighten and intensify the emotions and personalities of his characters. When faced with the destruction of everything you know, you find out who people really are, and what is really important. Frank Darabont’s adaptation of “The Walking Dead” for AMC shares this outlook, was an enormous popular and critical success, and Season One has just hit DVD/Blu-ray.

'Sanctum' Movie Review

“Sanctum”, the newest 3D extravaganza produced by James Cameron, will make you never go into a cave ever again. Not that “The Descent” didn’t already do that, but this time the only monsters lurking in the darkness are the human kind, not to mention one seriously pissed off Mother Nature. During the exploration of a series of unexplored, mostly underwater caves in Papua New Guinea, everything that can go wrong does go wrong. A diver drowns, a typhoon overtakes the camp before the team can escape the catacombs, and the torrential rains begin to fill caves with a handful of survivors trapped inside.

'2012' Movie Review

How has it taken me so long to watch “2012”? It’s like Roland Emmerich made a movie out of what constantly plays in my head when I close my eyes. This is the most amazing movie I’ve ever seen, and that statement is only partial hyperbole.