Last time they went to freaking space. In a Pontiac Fiero! So, the biggest question about Fast X, the tenth chapter in the Toretto-centric saga of Southern-California-car-enthusiasts-turned-international-mega-spies, is how the hell are they going to outdo that? Well, Jason Momoa as gay-coded street race Jesus is one way. Unfortunately, Momoa and his delirious, gleeful performance is the only thing Fast X has going for it. It’s also never been clearer just how much this franchise misses the late Paul Walker and how much it’s lost its way since his death.
F9, yes, the ninth installment of everyone’s favorite family-centric saga of street-racers-turned-international-agents-of-espionage, is somehow both exactly as ridiculous as expected and even sillier than anticipated. This makes the movie simultaneously ludicrous over-the-top escapism and tediously overwrought nonsense drama. It’s a strange duality. We’ve come so far from the days of hijacking shipments of DVD players.
A magnet car, a jet being taken out by a truck, beefy dudes brawling, talk of family, a long-dead character brought back to life, a flying Pontiac Fiero? All of this taken together can only mean one thing: there’s a new F9 trailer and it’s even more bonkers than you thought.
It’s tough out there for immortal soldiers who can’t die and have nothing to do but protect the world. So goes the new action adventure The Old Guard. With an incredible cast and a fantastic director, Netflix has what looks like another big hit on their hands. Check out the first trailer below.
If Mad Max: Fury Road and Monster
weren’t enough to convince you not to mess with Charlize Theron,
Atomic Blonde should do the trick. She’ll shoot you, stab
you with a stiletto heel, kick the ever-loving crap out of you, use your neck
as an anchor while she dives out a window Die Hard style,
and pummel your genitals into a wad of pasty goo. (She kicks so many dudes in
the groin.) Should the model-turned-Oscar-winner decide all she wants to do
from now until the day she retires is make kickass action movies, that might be
the best greatest hope for humanity.
If 2015’s Furious 7 was a bit too
reserved and subdued—what with cars parachuting from cargo planes and leaping
skyscraper to skyscraper—don’t worry, The Fate of the Furious,
also known as the eighth Fast and Furious movie (AKA #F8),
rectifies that with gleeful abandon. It walks a fine line between sheer idiocy and
inspired brilliance, often leaping back and forth between the two, and
represents a marked drop in quality in the franchise for the first time in
almost a decade.
It appears today is “second trailer for movies that
premiered at SXSW day.” Or something. Earlier, we saw the second trailer for
Edgar Wright’s Baby Driver, and now we’ve got a new look at
Atomic Blonde. Don’t worry, there’s still quite a bit of
Charlize Theron kicking people in the face. Enjoy.
John Wick assured that anytime stuntmen-turned-co-directors
Chad Stahelski and David Leitch do anything, I will watch the living hell out
of it. Leitch didn’t return for John Wick: Chapter 2 (which did
not disappoint) largely because he was flying solo on the now-titled
Atomic Blonde, which just dropped a trailer and, yeah, I am
100% holy shit in love with this Cold War actioner already. Stop what you’re
doing and watch it right this moment.
As long as they keep cranking out Fast &
Furious movies, and as long as they continue to spiral into insanity,
I’ll keep watching. And if you thought Furious 7, with it’s
CGI Paul Walker and cars jumping from building to building and parachuting out
of cargo planes was bonkers, well, you need to watch the new Fate of the Furious trailer. I don’t even know what they’re doing anymore,
but hot damn do I love it. Seriously, there’s a submarine in a car chase, what
more can a growing boy ask for?
Between Vin Diesel’s Dominic Toretto turning his back on his
makeshift family, Charlize Theron’s terrible, terrible pseudo-dreadlocks (is
she going to a rave?), and a goddamn submarine bursting through the icepack and
getting into a high-speed chase with a Lamborghini and a tank, I have no clue
what’s going on in the first trailer for The Fate of the
Furious, the latest in the Fast and Furious
franchise. But holy hell, whatever it is, I love the shit out of it.
The Charlize Theron-starring mystery thriller Dark Places finally opening in theaters marks the end of a long, strange
journey. Based on the novel by author Gillian Flynn, the film has been in the
can for a while now—principal photography wrapped in 2013—and with the hype
surrounding Gone Girl last year, also adapted from a Flynn
novel, it would have made sense to release it then to capitalize on the
attention. Instead, it languished on the shelf, hitting theaters in France in
April, and was actually available to DirecTV customers back in June.
You may or may not have noticed, but Mad Max: Fury Road is one of my favorite movies of the year—maybe number one,
easily top five (and I hate ranking movies). After tear-assing through theaters
worldwide, it’s getting ready to wreak havoc on home video, and to mark the
occasion, Warner Bros. released this new Blu-ray trailer.
The trailer for Dark Places, based on the
novel by Gone Girl author Gillian Flynn, is creepy and eerie
and looks like a dark, compelling whodunit. Libby Day (Charlize Theron)
survived the murder of her whole family, but when she is confronted by a
mysterious group of crime solvers years later, she is forced to confront what
she actually saw, or didn’t, as the case may be. Check out the trailer below.
If you hoped that Mad Max: Fury Road,
director/mastermind George Miller’s first visit to the post-apocalyptic wastes
we last saw 30 years ago in Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome, was
going to be nuts, you’re in luck, because it’s crazier than you ever dared
dream. Often described as one long chase scene, that’s not an inaccurate portrayal,
as it’s wall-to-wall visceral action, insane practical stunts, highly stylized
production, with a more thoughtful take on the apocalyptic than you probably
expect.
At this point, there’s not much more to say about
Mad Max: Fury Road. Next week it finally roars into theaters
after massive delays, reshoots, and the most epic marketing campaign that you’ve
ever seen. We got a deeper look at Tom Hardy’s Max Rockatansky the other day,
and now his partner in crime, Imperator Furiosa (Charlize Theron) has a featurette of
her own. Take a look after the jump.
Mad Max: Fury Road. At this point, those
four words fill me with an indescribable glee. Everything we’ve seen from
George Miller’s return to the post-apocalyptic wastes he first visited in 1979
is totally nuts. Now, in addition to the crazy trailers and posters, we’ve got
no less than six clips from what is easily our most anticipated movie of 2015
(hell, it’s been in the can long enough that it was also our most anticipated
movie of 2013 and 2013).
My reaction to Mad Max: Fury Road is gut
level and primal. I can’t see a TV spot, photo of a car, or poster without giggling
like a mindless chimp. That, of course, extends to this new and purportedly
“final” trailer for George Miller’s upcoming return to the post-apocalyptic
wastes. Check it out after the jump.
Mad Max: Fury Road is just over a month
away, and every time I think I can’t be more pumped for this, they go and do
something crazy like drop these two new international TV spots and a bunch of
new posters, and it’s like it’s all the first time I’m hearing about this all
over again. So check out all of that and try to contain your drool.
Seriously, I didn’t think I could be more excited for
Mad Max: Fury Road, but then they went ahead and released
this new trailer, and I have to admit that I’m even more stoked for George
Miller’s return to the post-apocalyptic wastes than I even thought possible. By
the time the May 15 release date rolls around, I’m going to be foaming at the
mouth.