If we’re being entirely honest, I have no idea why, in 2016 (in case you were curious, yes, I typed 2015 first), we’re talking about a xXx sequel, but here we are. As much as I love questionable action fare, the 2002 Vin Diesel-fronted, XTREME sports-centric flick is a total turd. It’s even more of a Mountain Dew commercial than the new Point Break (though it does still make me laugh that the villains are a group called Anarchy 99, that shit is gold). But apparently Vin Diesel wants this to happen, and when he puts him mind to it, things get done (see Riddick). And while it’s hard to condone this, they’ve added some legitimate badasses to the cast.
Titled xXx: The Return of Xander Cage (I wonder if they’re going to acknowledge the last sequel, 2005’s xXx: State of the Union with Ice Cube?) will obviously star Diesel as the viral daredevil-turned-international-spy, but we will also see international superstars Jet Li and Tony Jaa show up to kick some ass as well. There’s no word on their roles, but Twitch reports that the two martial artists will pummel the other characters. Guess Diesel liked what he saw working with Jaa on Furious 7. If you’re putting together and action movie, it’s hard to go wrong with either of these men.
Bollywood superstar Deepika Padukone has signed up for this ride, and will reportedly be one of the good guys. Newly crowned UFC featherweight champion Conor McGregor will also appear, making his big screen debut, and that’s going to be a thing that happens. We’ll see, but let’s just say that fighters making the transition to action heroes have a spotty track record (Ronda Rousey is going to be in a ton of movies now, but that doesn’t mean she should). But who knows, the weird little leprechaun could be awesome as a cackling, maniacal villain. I’d watch the shit out of that.
Directed by DJ Caruso (Disturbia), xXx 3 will reportedly shoot fairly soon, perhaps even before the next Fast & Furious movie. Start chugging energy drinks now.